All of your various bosses come to work with different backgrounds, personalities, styles, ways of communicating, work habits, motivations, levels of ability and skill and accomplishment. Some of them are more engaged than others. One boss wants to spell out every detail for you, while another boss expects you to figure out everything and memorize all the details on your own. One boss might pepper you with questions, while another boss might give you all the answers. One boss provides you with lots of reminders about your work every step of the way, while another boss checks in with you just once in a while. What do you do? You need to figure out what is going to work in your management relationship with each boss and customize your approach to each boss accordingly.

I'm not suggesting that you cater to the whims of each boss. But whims are not all bad. When you know the whims of a boss, then you know what that boss wants and that gives you more tools in your repertoire of solutions with that manager. That doesn't mean you should go along happily with downright bad management practices: If a boss wants you to figure out everything on your own, despite your lack of knowledge or experience, then that's a huge problem and you need to know that. If a boss wants to spoon-feed every assignment to you, despite your wealth of knowledge and experience, again that's a huge problem and you definitely need to know that. In the end, you may decide you cannot work for that boss. Or maybe you have no choice but to suffer through it. But don't pretend it's not happening.

The only way to really start figuring out what really works with each boss is to get in there and start having those one-on-one management conversations. As you talk with each boss, over time, try to tune in to that boss and work together to adjust your approach. Keep making adjustments constantly because each of you and your working relationship together will likely change and grow over time. The best way to keep fine-tuning your approach to each boss is to continually ask yourself six key questions about each boss:
* Who is this boss at work?
* Why do you need to manage this boss?
* What do you need to talk about with this boss?
* How should you communicate with this boss?
* Where should you talk with this boss?
* When should you talk with this boss?

Together, these six questions make up one of the most powerful tools I've ever encountered for customizing your approach to interacting with different people. I call this tool the "customizing" lens. I've used it to help tens of thousands of seminar-participants tune-in to their managers, their coworkers, and the employees they manage. You can use this tool to fine-tune your approach to interacting with any person inside or outside the workplace. Start asking and answering these questions and you'll see what I mean.